(Originally Posted On Myspace on 5/Jun/2008)

So, I was on the Train the other day, and I noticed that they’ve got posters up with different Haikus on them.

I decided to write one or two that would be more appropriate, considering they’re putting them in Trains:

—
Standing on platform
“City Loop train has been delayed”
What a big suprise
—
“We apologise
For the Inconvenience”
Murderous Impulses
—
Train has been cancelled
The next one has been delayed
You might as well walk
—
Train driver busy
he is molesting a goat
Train delayed again
—
Ticket prices rise
Service levels fall again
What do we pay for?
—
Trains always delayed
You claim to meet KPIs
Filthy fucking lies
—
Trains Never on time
Ninety-three percent my ass
fourty-three maybe
—
Ticket inspector
Donkey raping shit eater
Lowest form of life
—
If I ruled the world
Working for Connex would be
Punished by slow death
—
Public transport is
Enough to make me want to
Gouge out my eyeballs
—
Every fucking day
Train is delayed or cancelled
Incompetent pricks
—

Then I wrote one which has nothing to do with Trains:

Microsoft software
Does nothing you want. ever
Use Linux instead